Grief and Loss: Books for Children Who Have an Ill Parent

Moms Don’t Get Sick

by Pat Brack

$9.95 in paperback

Melius & Peterson Publishing Corporation

524 Citizens Bldg., Aberdeen, SD 57401

1990, ISBN 0-937603-7-4

This is a book written by Pat, a mother who has breast cancer, and Ben, her son, who is eight years old at the time of the diagnosis. This powerful book consists of alternating sections by mother and son, describing each one’s experience and feelings at various points throughout the treatment and recovery period. In the book, the mother and son share with you, in great detail, everything that is happening -- the events surrounding the mother's diagnosis, treatments and recovery. The mother and son each describe the events from a different point of view. This book can help a parent understand the child’s reactions; also, it will help school-age children identify with someone who has been through a similar experience.

This book is appropriate for mothers who have breast cancer and their children, ages eight to 14. It is helpful for the mother to read the book alone and then with the child, if the mother is experiencing breast cancer for the first time. The book takes about 1.5 to two hours to read.

My Mommy Has Cancer

by Carolyn Stearns Parkinson

Solace Publishing, Inc.

P.O. Box 567

Folsom, CA 95763-0567

916-851-1771

1991, ISBN 0-9630287-0-7

This is a story that shows a young boy, Eric, getting ready for Halloween while his Mother is in the hospital. She has cancer, and Eric does not understand what cancer is or why it makes people cry when they talk about it. His father explains cancer with an analogy of cells as bubbles. This analogy illustrates in simple words to small children how cancer destroys “good” cells. Eric continues to recall many events leading up to his visit to the hospital when he enters the room and yells, "Trick or treat!"

This book is appropriate for young children, ages three to eight, who have relatives with cancer. It offers some explanations about cancer while depicting the child continuing with his normal activities. It is very simple reading, and new readers will find it easy to read with their parents. Even younger children can have their parents read it to them in about five minutes.

Sammy’s Mommy Has Cancer: A Story for Children Who Have a Loved One with Cancer

by Sherry Kohlenberg

Gareth Stevens Publishing

1555 North River Center Drive, Suite 201, Milwaukee, WI 53212

Phone: 1-800-341-3659

1994, ISBN 0-8368-1071-6

A mother wrote this book for her child to help him understand what is happening with his mother and her developing breast cancer. The boy, Sammy, watches his mother through the diagnosis, the treatment, and the recovery, and he remains strong as his mother fights the cancer to get well. In the beginning of the book, the author has included a note to parents; she tells why she wrote this book that is especially helpful. Also, she includes some activities to do with your child to help them cope with the cancer.

This book is appropriate for very young children whose parent is in any stage of cancer. Children ages three to seven years old will benefit from this book. It takes about five to 10 minutes to read carefully.

When Eric’s Mom Fought Cancer

by Judith Vigna

Albert Whiteman & Company

6340 Oakton Street, Morton Grove, IL 60063-2723

1993, ISBN 0-8075-8883-0

This is a story about a boy, Eric, whose mother has breast cancer. The book starts with a flashback to the diagnosis of the breast cancer, when the family got together and hugged and cried. The morning of her operation, Eric’s grandmother comes to stay with him until his mother’s operation is over. When she returns home, she is unable to play with him. Eric does not believe that she will ever get better! His mother must have treatments for a long time. One night before she comes home, he makes a snowman for her. She is very sick, and she can not see the snowman. Eric is so angry at her that he destroys the snowman, but he is instantly sorry. Finally, Eric goes skiing with his father, and he has a lot of fun! While he is waiting for hot chocolate, he asks his father if he caused the cancer or if he could catch it; his father said, "No." At the gift shop, Eric buys a hat with pigtails for his mom, and she decides to wear it until her hair grows back.

This book is appropriate for children, ages six to 14, whose mothers are receiving treatment for cancer. It takes about five to 10 minutes to read.

When Someone Has a Very Serious Illness: Children Can Learn to Cope with Loss and Change

by Marge Heegaard

$7.00 in paperback

Kerry Harwood; Phone: 919-681-5288

1991, ISBN 0-9620502-4-5

This is an excellent activity book for children who have a loved one with an illness. It helps the child to understand -- what the illness is, what changes will happen when someone gets sick -- whether the changes are good or bad. The book discusses grief as a feeling that your child may experience. Also, it goes into all of the other feelings that your child may experience while a loved one has a serious illness. The workbook lists ways that your child can manage stress. Also there is a page on the people who can help the child through the rough times. The book asks if your child has God, a guardian angel, or even a favorite stuffed animal for support. Finally, the book tells your child that it is OK to have fun if someone in the family is sick; also, it’s OK to have special wishes.

This book is appropriate for children, ages six top 10, who have a loved one with an illness. A parent or another adult should introduce the book to the child. Plus, the parent or adult should be available to answer the child’s questions and discuss their drawings and illustrations.